Edmonton, AB (Canada) – A woman, Nicki Ann Gilbey (30), was sentenced to four-years for performing sexual acts on a 14-year old girl she was babysitting. Three weeks prior, Gilbey was sentenced to three-years for the sexual assault of a five-year old girl she was also babysitting. Gilbey plead guilty to sexual interference. In total, Gilbey will serve seven-years for performing victim-based crimes against children, while the children will spend years in therapy overcoming the trauma of the abuse. How is seven-years an appropriate sentence for such a traumatic crime?

As with most cases of abuse, Gilbey spent time coaxing or grooming her 14-year old victim and developing a relationship with the girl, eventually leading to a night of drugs and alcohol that further spurred the unwanted sexual acts. The victim’s statement described feelings of “betrayal and [being] used.” Gilbey’s defense, even amongst her guilty plea, was her own admission of childhood sexual abuse by a step-parent.

At what point is a victim responsible for overcoming their own trauma and preventing a continuation of the cycle? Apparently not soon enough — as they know what they are doing, but do it anyway. Sadly in Gilbey’s case, she was charged and released back into society after the incident with the 14-year old; thereby, allowing her to violate her five-year old victim. The abuse of the 14-year old happened in 2009; whereas, the abuse of the five-year old happened on August 10, 2010. She was the babysitter for the five-year old. In fact, she was a family friend.

How can charges be filed and within a year the abuser is victimizing yet another child? How do we as a society curb the chances of these events happening? In the case of the five-year old, Gilbey was a “friend of the family” whom the mom let babysit her five and ten-year old daughters. Was the mother, being Gilbey’s friend, unaware of the sexual interference charges from the prior year? Was she unaware that her “friend” was an admitted sexual predator? The abuse occurred while the mom was on a 90-minute shopping trip — 90-minutes, forever changed this little girl’s life and stripped her of her innocence.

As for Gilbey, she received seven-years in prison, a mandatory DNA sample w/name inclusion on the national sex offender registry for 20-years, and the inability to volunteer or be in a position of trust with anyone under 18-years of age. These are all reactive sentences. What about mandatory counseling to work through the long-standing affects of her own abuse? When do we rehabilitate, properly? What happens if the victims don’t end the cycle because society focuses on the reaction, and not the prevention?

At what point do we as society recognize this epidemic that kills childhood innocence? At what point do we make a stand and perform prevention and awareness campaigns to end the silence? If Gilbey received help for her own abuse, could she have prevented the cycle? Was she afraid of the label society would put on her if she revealed her secret? Instead, she allowed living her secret to consume her. Her secret eventually was exposed, but not before it was shared privately with two innocent children, who now have their own secret.