April 10, 2010 (Austin, Texas) – Tiffani Wampler spoke at SafePlace’s Field Day 2010, she spoke out about her experience and why it is so important to begin the healing process and let someone know about the abuse. Click the video link below to watch her short, but moving speech that opened the day’s events.
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I don’t wish to take up much of your time, but I come to you and the law makers of America in complete ANGER! I am a survivor of sexual abuse! I have spent ten years on and off in therapy to realize I can live a normal and healthy life. However, not everyone has the ability or support to heal. The main issue victims of abuse face is the “slap on the wrist” laws that do not protect the victim, but the abusers! There is no just in a system that continues to allow these men and women get away with the crimes they comment, when in fact their victims are more likely to commit suicide then attempt surviving the pain that goes hand in hand with abuse. They kill our souls and the people we could have been. I will never understand how anyone can harm a child, but the reality is, IT IS HAPPENING!!! Something has got to stop these people from being able to commit these crimes over and over again. A serial child molester has over 400 victims. How on earth does that person deserve probation and the SILLY laws that surround the probation time frame. Yes, it sounds great that they can’t live with in a certain range of children/schools. Or that they cannot work in particular areas and need to register themselves as a sex offender. BUT we all know this isn’t working. This system is failing the future children of the world. How many more children such as Cheslea King do we need to see die from the hands of an abuser? I can only hope that in due time SOMEONE realizes that this crime is up to par with MURDER and needs to be taken seriously!!!
Thank you for your time,
Tiffani Wampler
After watching Oprah today I can honestly say I cannot imagine having survived what Gregg endured at such a young age. I agree with Oprah that it is quite a miracle that he has lived a successful life along with maintaining some sort of normal in relationships with his wife, family, and son. I am almost speechless as to how it made me feel to watch someone I “know” talk about the pain the abuse caused their life.
Having to feel the need to protect his siblings has got to be a huge weight at any age, much less 9 years old and up. No child should ever understand that kind of suffering, nor be the protector of their family when they are unable (due to reality of age) protect themselves. I am so sorry that this was the case and I am quite thankful that there was a day Gregg realized in order to save his sister he had to get out; in turn he saved himself.
There has got to be some sort of justice to those who commit such horrendous crimes! No child should ever endure what this man or millions of other children are going through on a daily basis.
Gregg, I am so proud of you for sharing your story and stopping the cycle of abuse in your family. I am certain you have reached millions today and of that, thousands will speak up (we can hope, right?) !!!! Hugs to you and yours.
Hugs,
Tiffani Wampler
I have spent the past week doing research on sexual abuse. I have found some fantastic information and resources that just prove that we are NOT crazy! LOL. It is so important that we all get on board to start understanding that we are “normal.” It may not be what society views as “normal” but we are normal for how we grew up and all that we endured. Sexual abuse has many symptoms, responses, and feelings…all of which is completly OK!
One article I found very intersting is about spanking being considered sexual abuse. I was spanked all of four times in my childhood all of which were before the abuse ever started. After reading this article I do not consider those spankings sexual abuse, HOWEVER I do agree with what this woman endured as a child and many others like her, did experience sexual abuse. You are not alone if you feel that your beatings were more about getting someone off then punishment.
She described in great detail the way her father would make her bend over further and further, bare bottom, and she didnt dare put her hands on her bottom as that only resulted in more beatings. WOW. It was a hard read and could cause so many triggers for those who were abused in the same ways.
Hugs.
Tiffani Wampler
No, the pain is not in your head! Yes, you actually feel the pain. The pain is real. No one is telling you there is no pain. However, the truth is, our bodies deal with emotional pain physically. After years of being sexually abused it is only common that you are going to have physical symptoms that don’t add up in your head.
I know first hand what that pain feels like. I went through years of diagnoses. I did have Endometriosis, cervical cancer (twice), and many other female “issues”, but over all I started physically feeling better after a few years of constructive therapy, doing this site, and talking openly to those I trust. I still have days where I think the physical pain is stemming from something emotional, but I don’t have the tools to totally recognize that right now.
Taking pain pills can help. I do not have an addictive personality, even while depressed. Just know that it is easy to get addicted to something when you are depressed. Make sure you look for those signs. If you wake up popping pills, feel as though you cannot function with out them, or start getting them from friends then it is time to talk to a doctor about the amount of pills you are taking.
What kind of physical pains do you think you have from being abused?
Hugs,
Tiffani
I applaud Oprah and her attempts to educate the world on sexual abuse. I have dreamt for years of sitting on her couch to explain my story in hopes of saving someone else’s life; even if it’s only one. Today, a rep from RAINN contacted me to see if I would be interested in appearing on Oprah with my father (the abuser). Oh, wow. I must say I had to take a deep breath and think quickly if this is something I could do. After all, my father still blames me for the abuse, and I fear he would do so on TV. Ouch. We spoke briefly of what they were looking for, and because my father is still in prison it doesn’t work. Oprah was looking for someone who could sit in the same studio and share their story. Wow. I am speechless for about the tenth time in my life.
I have always wanted to confront my father, but the words I have invisoned saying would be bleeped out! I did post a blog on DailyStrength and asked my friends what they would say to their abusers. We all pretty much had the same response of “go rot in hell.” I would think most of us survivors feel that way.
It will be an interesting peice to watch. I will certainly let everyone know when the show will be airing once I figure that out myself.
Hugs to all.
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