You are currently browsing the archives for March 2010

Please view video from RAINN

  • Posted on March 25, 2010 at 9:29 pm

Please take a second to view the video posted from RAINN.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KgacCtErw_0

Missing “dad”

  • Posted on March 24, 2010 at 9:08 pm

To start I don’t miss the Dad I had, but the one I should have had. So please don’t confuse that I miss the person who is actually my father.

I am watching The Locator. A show that appears on WE tv. I hardly watch as I sit and cry through every episode. Though, I have no idea what it feels like to be a adopted or to have adopted my child to someone, I do know the feeling of emptiness by not having a father in  my life. I clearly know who my biological father is, but he is not the father I wish I had. He is simply the man who made it possible for me to be here, but I still miss the ideal dad that other people have had in their life.

I have never had the father I could lean on for guy advice, as my father was jealous of every man in my life and therefore would do what he could to keep me single. I miss the dad I could call and share a silly story about his grandchildren and not worry that he is thinking sick and twisted thoughts. I miss the idea of growing up in a secure household that gave me the ability to understand life a little better.

I hate that I don’t have a dad to run to, hug, know, trust, believe in, and feel support from!!!

Hugs,

Tiffani

Dear President Obama

  • Posted on March 10, 2010 at 9:41 am
I don’t wish to take up much of your time, but I come to you and the law makers of America in complete ANGER! I am a survivor of sexual abuse! I have spent ten years on and off in therapy to realize I can live a normal and healthy life. However, not everyone has the ability or support to heal. The main issue victims of abuse face is the “slap on the wrist” laws that do not protect the victim, but the abusers! There is no just in a system that continues to allow these men and women get away with the crimes they comment, when in fact their victims are more likely to commit suicide then attempt surviving the pain that goes hand in hand with abuse. They kill our souls and the people we could have been. I will never understand how anyone can harm a child, but the reality is, IT IS HAPPENING!!! Something has got to stop these people from being able to commit these crimes over and over again. A serial child molester has over 400 victims. How on earth does that person deserve probation and the SILLY laws that surround the probation time frame. Yes, it sounds great that they can’t live with in a certain range of children/schools. Or that they cannot work in particular areas and need to register themselves as a sex offender. BUT we all know this isn’t working. This system is failing the future children of the world. How many more children such as Cheslea King do we need to see die from the hands of an abuser? I can only hope that in due time SOMEONE realizes that this crime is up to par with MURDER and needs to be taken seriously!!!
Thank you for your time,
Tiffani Wampler

Study group needs your help:

  • Posted on March 10, 2010 at 9:05 am
CALL FOR PARTICIPANTS

Phenomenological Investigation of Healthy Adult Survivors of Adverse Childhood Experiences

The question of what determines adult health and well-being is important to all countries. The Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) Study is a major American research project that poses the question whether, and how, childhood experiences affect adult health decades later. This question is being answered with the ongoing collaboration of Robert Anda, M.D. at the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) and Vincent Felitti, M.D., with Kaiser Permanente’s Department of Preventive Medicine in San Diego, California. The findings from the ACE studies have provided remarkable insights into how we become what we are as individuals and as a nation. The ACE Studies have revealed a powerful relationship between our emotional experiences as children and our physical and mental health as adults, as well as the major causes of adult mortality in the United States.

This investigation is seeking to briefly interview women over 45 years of age who:

Score 4 or more on the brief Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) Study Questionnaire (SEE BELOW).

AND, HAVE NOT BEEN DIAGNOSED WITH:

Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease
Any form of Cancer
Ischemic Heart Disease
Stroke
Chronic Bronchitis or Emphysema
Diabetes
Frequent Skeletal Fractures
Hepatitis or Jaundice
Chronic Enduring Depression

AND, DO NOT HAVE ANY OF THE FOLLOWING HEALTH BEHAVIOR RISK FACTORS:

Smoke
Intravenous Drug Use
One or more Suicide Attempts
Chemical Dependency
Sexually Transmitted Disease
Sexually Promiscuous

ACE STUDY QUESTIONAIRE:

While you were growing up, during your first 18 years of life:

1. Did a parent or other adult In the household often or very often…
Swear at you, insult you, put you down, or humiliate you? OR
Act in a way that made you afraid that you might be physically hurt?

Yes__________ No__________

2. Did a parent or other adult in the household often or very often…
Push, grab, slap, or throw something at you? OR
Ever hit you so hard that you had marks or were injured?

Yes__________ No__________

3. Did an adult or person at least 5 years older than you ever…
Touch or fondle you or have you touch their body in a sexual way? OR
Attempt or actually have oral, anal, or vaginal intercourse with you?

Yes__________ No__________

4. Did you often or very often feel that…
No one in your family loved you or thought you were important or special? OR
Your family didn’t look out for each other, feel close to each other, or support each other?

Yes__________ No__________

5. Did you often or very often feel that…
You didn’t have enough to eat, had to wear dirty clothes, and had no one to protect you? OR
Your parents were too drunk or high to take care of you or take you to the doctor if you needed it?

Yes__________ No__________

6. Were your parents ever separated or divorced?

Yes__________ No__________

7. Was your mother or stepmother:
Often or very often pushed, grabbed, slapped, or had something thrown at her? OR
Sometimes, often or very often kicked, bitten, hit with a fist, or hit with something hard? OR
Ever repeatedly hit at least a few minutes or threatened with a gun or knife?

Yes__________ No__________

8. Did you live with anyone who was a problem drinker or alcoholic or who used street drugs?
Yes__________ No__________

9. Was a household member depressed or mentally ill, or did a household member attempt suicide?

Yes__________ No__________

10. Did a household member go to prison?

Yes__________ No__________

NOW ADD UP YOUR “YES” ANSWERS:__________ THIS IS YOUR ACE SCORE.

Pearl Healing, LLC

  • Posted on March 10, 2010 at 9:03 am

I have stumbled across a great group of AMAZING therapist with a mission to heal the world. I love what they stand for and wanted to make sure everyone knew they were out there for help. They are located in the Denver/Centennial/ Littleton, CO area. Please contact Pearl Healing, LLC for more information.

Their mission:  Empowering survivors to be present and thrive in their lives.

Reaca Pearl, MA
Psychotherapist
(303) 260-9540
Denver/Centennial/Littleton, C
O
reaca@pearlhealingllc.com
www.pearlhealingllc.com


Check out this blog!

  • Posted on March 9, 2010 at 12:50 pm

http://butterflyspirittales.blogspot.com/

Great stuff for support and information!!

Hugs

Tiffani

Report the abuse!

  • Posted on March 9, 2010 at 12:37 pm

60% of abuse isn’t reported!!! It doesn’t surprise me, but I hope we can change it in the future. The only way the cycle stops is when we report the abuse!!!

Even if you more out, leave, or tell a friend…the abuse could be happening to someone else. Allowing the authorities to take over will only give you greater odds in the justice system protecting you and preventing it from happening to someone else!!

Hugs

Tiffani

They get to live a “normal” life

  • Posted on March 5, 2010 at 7:09 pm

While talking to a friend of mine today, she had a good question:

Is it normal for  my dad to just walk around like nothing happens?

She later explained that after he touches her he’ll just go pay the bills, watch tv, or some other random/daily activity. I think it is a valid point to understand that people who choose to abuse their children, or even strangers DO NOT walk around with their head hung in shame or announcing what they have done. It is their point to remain as normal as possible and to fit into society so that they can continue to harm others.

Please be aware, that even the nicest man/woman, the leader of your church, or neighbor are people who could abuse. The key is to understand the signs of abuse and educate those around us on how to protect/tell so that we can do something about it.

Silence is their friend.

Tiffani

Chelsa King kidnapped by registered sex offender?

  • Posted on March 2, 2010 at 7:59 am

After watching the Good Morning America clip about the kidnapping of Chelsa King, and the possibilities she was kidnapped by a registered sex offender I am just stunned that the world continues to only freak out when we have moments like this. Thankfully Chelsa made headline news, but please EVERYONE realize this is happening on a daily basis. We have got to start doing everything we can to fight this crime and make those who offend suffer a punishment that does not allow them out of prison on good behavior. We need to buckle down and pay attention to the offenders and force them to abide by the laws set forth to protect the innocent.

It amazes me that my father was able to be up for parole in three SHORT years of serving his term. He has no right to walk the streets and be free just so someone else can fall prey to his sweet mannerisms. manipulative gesters, and controlling mind games. These TYPE OF PEOPLE know how to use the system in their favor. They know how to get into the hearts of children to get them to trust them and believe their lies.

I don’t know what the next step is, but I do know that law makers have got to become more aware of this horrible crime. They are killing the people we could have been. It is a crime one never forgets, and yet it is treated with a slap on a wrist.

Please help. We need more voices to stand up and do something.

Tiffani